from the desk of: george washington

hey humans. this is george. sean said that everyone would be interested in hearing about me, so josephine asked me to write a little something about how my life's going lately. since i recently learned how to type, i accepted the challenge. but what to say?
here is the thing: i mostly sleep. because i am a fucking cat.
here are some places i like to sleep:
on josephine
on brian
on guests
in drawers
in the dryer
on the tv
on the computer monitor

other things i enjoy doing include: stretching, walking/perching on tv and computer monitor, looking out windows, trying to escape my apartment, taking really long pees, and scratching bitches.

things i will never do include: save british children, invite clementine or saber over (thanks brian and josephine), forget upton.

i am pretty happy here at 2016 banita street apartment 4, but i wish i could go outside. jo says that she will get me a collar and then we'll see. but jo is a pirate hooker. she feeds me twice a day which is sweet, but i was getting a little hefty there for a while. so now she starves me and makes me run on treadmills. yeah. that's true.

time to go sleep. bye bitches. don't ever forget: I WILL KILL YOU.

the story of the picture

this weekend clementine was visiting me and brian so george was not altogether thrilled. he likes her ok, but he only wants to play with her when she does not really play back. which is not usually clementine's style. she is a hands on friend. or, tongues on.
so as i was about to go to bed i realized i hadn't seen george in a while. i feared that he might be outside (yes he is a domesticated creature now) but knew that he is a good hider so he might bre inside, and that he could handle it if he was outside, and i gave up looking for him.
i went to bed, and before i fell asleep, brian came and brought me to the laundry room. because he had found george. in the dryer. i had left my clothes in there, and the door open, so i guess he decided to make himself at home in there among the clean, yummy clothes. he was cleaning himself and as brian tried to take a picture he got up and started to come out, and thus the picture on the sidebar. <--------
the moral of this story is that george is the CUTEST THING ever.
thank you.

An email from Mari

Subject: I hope you are all OK!

Josephine,

I am back.
I hope you survived IKE last weekend.
Izumi was here to visit us and was nice to see him.
He looks good and adjusting well to his new environment.

I am glad you had George Washington with you.
I'm sure Samuel is very happy about that.

Take Care!

Love
Mari